The husband of a dear friend just passed away. I contemplate over words sufficient to wrap around her like a genuine embrace if I were with her heart to heart. None are suitable. No vibration in a compilation of letters is adequate substitute for the sounds of grieving that supports the body as it quakes in the absence of her mate.
I recall driving down a road one morning and startled to hear the very loud howling of a coyote on the side of the road. Its mate, likely hit by a car, lay dead only a few feet away. The obvious angst was not only audible, but with each howl the coyote inhaled with every muscle and then uncoiled to stretch its neck and head tall to all who would observe this display of anguish.
Our culture does not encourage the expression of our grief in such a satisfactory and visceral manner. My family witnessed a funeral procession when visiting a small village in the Netherlands. The procession was on foot in the cold, with dozens of adults and children all in black attire following half a dozen men carrying the casket above their shoulders. The followers were not subdued. They were wailing. They freed from their bodies their anguish, allowing the reverberations of grief to fully resonate the extent of their emotions. They were not self-conscious, nor apologetic in expressing their loss as their body and culture allowed them.
Only a few days before the passing of my friend’s husband, she communicated to me that he had read and re-read the Christmas card I had sent them. I had painted the card and wrote the following message within. Something in the words resonated with him at this time, and I offer these words to each of you to guide you into the New Year.
May you awaken each day to the solitude and peace of your inner knowing.
May you seek to live each day with direction and courage.
May you recognize your gifts and use them with the wisdom with which they were bestowed upon you.
May you see in the mirror only your inner beauty.
May the calm of your deepest understanding give you peace of mind and heart when fear beckons outside your door.
May the truth of who you are free you from the falsehoods defined by others.
May you make moments in your day to celebrate your blessings.
May you recognize the resonance of your heart vibrating always to truth.
by Judith Haynes
© January, 2010
A Blessing to You For The New Year
Wishing you a safe, healthy, happy, and blessed New Year.
- December 2012 Newsletter – Fundamental Truths of Living and Dying
- GUIDANCE for the NEW YEAR